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Plot Summary:Wall-Eyed Pete, Curly Whiskerlegs and Rattlesnake Pete, known as the three guardsmen, get in bad with three pretty waitresses by misinterpreting the girls' request of the amorous trio that they \"ask Aunt first.\" They ask the unattractive aunts - and are accepted at the aunts. To escape the aunts, they eagerly accept the job of driving 60 miles across the desert to Tombstone, to fetch a ton of fireworks for the projected Fourth of July celebration at Santa Banana. The Amusement Committee warns them that they must not waste the city's funds on liquor and gambling. Arriving in Tombstone, they protect one another from the allurements of rye and poker, and start home with the fireworks, after the storekeeper, has smuggled a demijohn aboard with his compliments. The guardsmen are warned by Capt. Wheeler's Rangers that the bandits are on the road. In a gulch the outfit is overtaken by twenty bandits. After a fight the guardsmen are captured. The bandits discover the firewater and hold an orgy around the campfire close to the explosives. That night Wall-Eyed Pete wheedles the Lone Guard into letting him smoke a cheroot. With it he burns the thongs from Curly's wrists, and, after setting fire to the wagon, they escape on one horse. The air is filled with a dazzling pyrotechnic display, which drives the drunken bandits in every direction. Next day the three guardsmen meet the rangers and send them back after the bandits. Meantime, at Santa Banana the Fourth of July celebration languishes, the crowd loudly demanding fireworks as advertised. The Committee, deciding that the guardsmen are off on a drunk, send a gun-man after them. He brings them in. Their tale of heroic daring is scoffed at. On the plea that the three guardsmen owe it to the town to make good by furnishing some sort of celebration, the Committee on Amusements decide to lynch them \"to make a Roman holiday.\" The three bellicose aunts rush to the rescue of the unhappy heroes. Thus intimidated, the Committee gallantly waive the point, confer with the parson and decide to change the punishment. The horrified guardsmen are given their choice of marrying the aunts on the spot or being lynched. After a vain appeal to the still haughty girls, the boys ungallantly chose hanging, whereupon the outraged aunts attack the guardsmen. The nieces start to interpose but the ruction is interrupted by the entrance of Wheeler's rangers, bringing a string of captive bandits, who make signs that they still see sky-rockets and pin wheels. Explanations and apologies follow, and the boys are hailed as heroes. The girls relent and the right sort of wedding ensues, to the huge delight of the whole assembled population of Santa Banana.
